Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I am making a commitment to myself

I don't even have any words to describe how much I love this video.

A while back Jamie from Inspired Mess made a post about the blog Visionary Mom, I checked it out, and signed up for the Visionary Mom Manifesto, but didn't read it until today. It was pretty unreal to read something that put my thoughts out on paper so clearly. For months now, maybe even longer, I have been realizing that I have lost myself. I don't mean to sound self indulgent, I know everyone goes through an identity crisis from time to time, but this really is something that I have never felt. I really, truly don't know who I am anymore outside of being a wife and a mother.

I worry because I don't have big dreams for myself and I can't even really begin to think of what big dreams I should have. I don't go out and enjoy people the way that I used to, I have no real sense of style, I just have no ME anymore. I love being a mother and I love being a wife, they are the things that I want to be more than anything. I am just starting to realize that there needs to be MORE. I need to do things for myself and be passionate about things that I enjoy for myself. I cannot be a good wife or mother without taking care of myself. I also think that my self esteem will never be what it should be until I find myself again. If I am always living for other people, to much of who I am depends on what other people think of me.

So, starting tonight, right now, I am pledging to myself that I am going to rediscover who I am and what I want out of life.

I am going to take the time to remember that I am a person outside of Josh and John.

I am going to make friends, because I don't have any friends outside of my family who truly know who I am. How could they, when I don't even know who I am?

I am going to step outside of my comfort zone and remember that what people think of me does not define who I am.

It will be a journey...but I am going to DO IT! And I am not going to make any apologies for it :)

5 comments:

  1. I am so proud of you!! :) It is the best thing I have done for myself. I am not a mom, but I am a wife and I was losing os much of myself. My eyes were opened the minute I lost my mom~ I need more people in my life, the people who have always been there and the new people, like you, that are there for me in so many ways. It is important to rediscover your own loves in life and happinesses!! You inspire me!! Thank you for sharing!! You are amazing! :)

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  2. This is amazing, Katie!!!! I'm so proud of you too!!! We'll all be here for you and cheering you all along the way!!! This is awesome! =)

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  3. here here darling! if you ever want to go out just let me know, oh and I am super excited for tomorrow!

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  4. did you write this or did I? It's what I like to call a 'mommy freak-out' when you realize that you have no freaking clue how to even begin to describe yourself without using adjectives about motherhood or married life. It's why I started a blog in the first place! We'll make a hangout gameplan when you come over on Monday ;)

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