Coming to close

So, we are on day 10 of our cleanse. Five days of raw and five days of juicing. It's been really good, although way too expensive for us. We got produce for the 5 juicing days and it was about $160. That is usually our food budget for almost two weeks. Soooo, we can't really do the reboot exclusively after today. For the next five days we are going to try and eat mostly fruits and veggies, with nuts and beans mixed in. I am going to work to stay away from sugar and processed foods. It is soo worth it. I feel great and I have lost 11 pounds in 10 days. I have energy and just generally feel better. So that's the diet. I will probably post pics in about a month, once the exercize and diet have continued to pay off. Luckily, we are getting cooler weather here in AZ, so it will be much more pleasant to exercize out side.


I have been really productive craftwise this month. I made John an countdown to Halloween calendar. Each square is a little pocket for a small surprise. I designed it and embroidered all of it, and I love how it turned out. I got the idea from a Pottery Barn catalogue, but there is no way I was going to pay Pottery Barn prices.

Each day I put a small surprise in for John.

I made small fall faeries for the first day. I haven't really gotten pictures of the other things, but I also made him a small crocheted pumpkin, a pumpkin mask, a set of finger puppets, a small painted jack o' lantern and a few other things. He is so excited to go check the calendar every morning :)

I took pictures of some of the other fall crafts, but apperantly I forgot to load them onto my computer. I will post them soon.

Days 2 and 3

I am three days into my Reboot now. Day 2 was rough, but not quite as rough as I thought it would be. I was a little nauseated and tired, but that was about it. Today I woke up and was pretty nauseated and had a headache, but those went away about 9am and haven't come back. While I was cooking dinner I realized that I had a lot more energy than earlier in the day. I think that we may have gotten over the worst of the detoxing.
I really meant to take pics of the food because dinner last night was soooo good. Green veggie soup and acorn squash stuffed with portobello mushrooms. There were lots of leftovers, so that helped with the prep today.
Tomorrow we have two juices instead of just one. The morning juice is supposed to be this Mexican-style Jugo. It is cucumber, cilantro, jalepeno and something else. I had to draw the line, I can't drink that. So Josh is going to have that and I made a kale and fruit green juice. I want to be healthy, but not badly enough to puke up cucumber juice :)

...and so it begins

Today we started our Reboot. I had prepared almost everything yesterday, which was good because we had some errands to run. We were able to put everything into a big cooler for lunch, and we dragged it to Starbucks so that we could eat with Josh. I am sure we looked strange with our giant cooler, but it felt good to eat something healthy while we were out instead of Rubio's or Chipotle.
I will admit, it is going to be a challenge and a major learning experience for my taste buds. I am a really bland eater, so green juices and crazy soups/salads are a stretch for me. But I am going to do it with gusto, even if I have a grimace on my face :)
So today's plan was:
Breakfast - baked apples and raisins - John didn't even want to eat it because it was too "squishy." Josh and I thought it was decent.
Morning Juice - Green Juice with Kale, Cucumbers, Spinach, Celery and apples. It was actually pretty good.
Lunch - Salad with a homemade mustard/vinagrette dressing and raw carrot/avocado/ginger soup. It was too much food, but it didn't leave me satisfied for long.
Dinner - Steamed veggies, more soup and a pear (which I saved for later)
***This isn't supposed to be one of those diets where you deny yourself food. The good thing about fruits and veggies is that you can consume lots and lots of them without tipping the caloric scale. Unfortunately, veggies aren't usually my idea of a good time, so my appetite runs out before I get enough food. I know that will change with time though****
aaaand, here is the rough part...the pictures. This is me now...

Not entirely sure why John looks like he is resting on my butt, I think he just wanted in on the photo action. At least there is something cute to focus on :) Sweatpants and rain boots, can you dig it.

So, one day down and going strong

Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead

I get sick....a lot. It seems that lately I have been on a constant stream of antibiotics, antidepressants, sleep medications, and pain medications. I think so much of it stems from the fact that my diet is so unhealthy. Not the vegan part, that's not to blame. It's the LAZY vegan part. Carbs and sugars, comfort food and processed food...it's a problem and I know it. I lost around 60 pounds after I had John and went vegan. Since moving in with my dad a year and a half ago I have gained every pound of it back.
So, that is all just an intro to say that Josh and I are done with that. We watched a documentary called, wait for it...Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. The movie is about a guy who is unhealthy and overweight, He decides to go on a 60 day juice fast made entirely of fruits and veggies. Along the way he travels around and talks to people about his diet and their diets, as well as the changes happening to him. It was amazing! In under a years he was off of his medications and living a completely different life. Now, we won't be doing 60 days. I think we are starting off at 10-12 actually completely juice days, with a 5 day raw intro. We start the intro tomorrow. I am about 60% excited and 40% terrified. It is going to be a huge test for me, but one that I think may change our lives. The point is to detox and the retrain your body to crave fruits and veggies. Obviously, after the fast/cleanse, we will transitions beans, nuts, and other foods back into our diet. Hopefully, we will eliminate our dependence on processed foods, even if they are foods that I cook myself.
I figured it would be cool to document the journey here, so that's what I will do. I think tomorrow I will even post some before pictures so that I have something to look at in two or three weeks and see what happened.
For today though, here are some pics of what 5 days worth of produce looks like for two people.
 ***John is obviously not going to be Rebooting his diet. He will be able to drink the juices and get the nutrients, but he will do that on top of his regular diet. I am definitely not experimenting on him :) ***

I know that this is probably not going to be read by very many people, but here is the website for the Reboot diet, if anyone is interested.

Magic

I have never been a huge fan of Radiohead. I like some stuff, but I usually feel like it is kind of arty and self-indulgent. Then I discovered In Rainbows, which is TOTALLY "arty" and I cannot get enough. I have had this cd on repeat for days. I love every track, but something about Nude stands out.

It literally makes me feel like the world is falling away and I am just floating in the most perfect way.

 I am entranced.

A Song of Fire and Ice

So...I am usually not all that interested in "fantasy" or sci-fi novels, but I stared this series this last month. I am on the fourth book which means I am like 3,000 pages into this series in under a month. I cannot stop reading, and I sort of want to! I am not even going to summarize on my own because the story is vast and intricate. Here is a summary from Wikipedia (dubious information at times, but this is accurate)

The story of A Song of Ice and Fire takes place in a fictional world, primarily upon a continent called Westeros but also on a large landmass to the east, known as Essos.[5] Most of the characters are human but as the series progresses other races are introduced, such as the cold and menacing Others from the far North and fire-breathing dragons from the East, both races thought to be extinct by the people of the story. There are three principal storylines in the series: the chronicling of a dynastic civil war for control of Westeros among several competing families; the rising threat of the Others, who dwell beyond an immense wall of ice that forms Westeros' northern border; and the ambition of Daenerys Targaryen, the exiled daughter of a king who was murdered in another civil war 15 years previously, to return to Westeros and claim her rightful throne. As the series progresses, all three storylines become increasingly interwoven and dependent on each other.

The story is told in chapters that jump back and forth from different characters point of view. It is an interesting way to tell the story because as you get excited about one characters story line the author moves to another. I have found myself skipping ahead to find out about someones situation more than once.

Anyway, I have strep throat right now and am hoping to finish the fourth book as I recover, which may be the only upside of strep throat :)

The Woods...

I got a new tattoo for my 30th birthday. I spent a lot of time deciding what I wanted, but in the end I just went with the words that have stood out to me for so long. "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening" has a stanza that almost burns through me...
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
and miles to go before I sleep,
and miles to go before I sleep.
I don't really know what Frost hoped to convey with this poem. I mean, I can always speculate and imagine, which is one of the great aspects of poetry, but the meaning that is important to me is the one that I have made.
I suffer from pretty serious depression, and it has played a part in many turbulent times in my life. I got this tattoo to remind me that though the depression may be lovely, dark and deep (and, to me, sometimes the solitude and magnitude can be lovely in its own unhealthy way) I have promises to keep and so so so far to go before I could ever imagine giving in and letting depression take over.
I hope I can look at this tattoo for the rest of my life and feel exactly that way I do about it right now.

My Name Is Katie

John and I

This is me, the biggest part of who I am... a mother. I am more than a mother, but this is the part of my life that brings me the most unadulterated joy. Of course, it is also the hardest part of my life, the scariest, the silliest, the most emotional...It is everything.

I started this blog over a year ago, and I let it go about three months ago. I just didn't have anything else to say anymore. Lately though, I find myself wanting to turn back to the blog and the connections that I made here. I find myself wanting to express myself here again. We'll see :)



My Head is Spinning

Whenever things calm down a little bit life seems to throw us a curve ball. We are moving...quickly. My dad's house sold at auction a week ago and we got notice that we have to be out in two weeks, actually a week and 5 days. That means that I have to pack our apartment and help pack my dad's house, which has about 30 years of accumulated stuff. We also have to find and secure a rental house to move into. We are all very excited at the prospect of a newer, larger house but this whole process is pretty stressful.
So, I guess things may be quiet at Unkamama again...

Look Mom!

 We went on a nature walk/park trip today and John wore his awesome haedlamp that is 32 sizes to big.

I love that he looks like a kid, not just a baby. I miss the days when he was so small, but these days bring me so much laughter. He says the most random things ie, "Why does she want to ride on a disco stick?" How does one even answer that?

I saw this little pill bug and we stopped to say hi. We put down a stick and the "friend" climbed on, which allowed John to get a closer look. He was so gentle but he wanted to take his new friend with us. I had to explain that we couldn't take him away from his family. We ended up making three trips back to see the little guy.

A few feet further John said, "Look Mom, another friend!" It was an ant that also climbed up onto a stick for inspection.

John looked at it for a few minutes and then said "Mom, he loves me."

How rad is my kid with his baby dreads. They formed completely on their own, and yes, I do wash his hair.

Painting a gift for daddy's birthday.

We had such a wonderful day again today :)



10 Randoms

Here are ten random things that I am loving/thinking/doing/dreaming...

1. Josh and I have been watching this show, Everest: Beyond the Limit, on Netflix. It has renewed my crazy passion for all things having to do with Sagarmatha. It inspired me to start reading and dreaming about a trek to Base Camp. I have no desire to stand on the summit of Everest, I don't ever want to "conquer" her. I really just want to bask in her presence and beauty.


2. John has started saying "I Love You" about 100 times a day. There is literally nothing better than hearing him call from another room, "Mom....I Love You." He does it for no reason and it completely fill me up when my reserves are low.

3. Josh and I are taking a financial planning class. I hate all things having to do with money. I wish I could barter and just remove myself from the process. I might actually be a little afraid of it since it has been such an issue for us. The bottom line is that we are assholes with our money and have to learn to save and be a little wiser. Josh is about a month away from a promotion, which would mean we are about 6-8 months away from getting a place of our own. If we want it to actually happen we have to be able to stick to a budget, so off to class we go

4. We sold our second car, so we are a one car family. John and I have been walking to the grocery store and a few other places. We have also been sticking closer to home, which slows down the pace of our day in a way I had been dreaming of. It feels good to keep simplifying.

5. Josh turns 30 on Saturday!!! I am about 3 month behind him. I think we are going to plan a night out drinking and laughing with all of our friends in mid-April. 30 feels like such a milestone and for some reason I am truly, deeply excited. I joke about 30-anxiety, but it feels like such a concrete step into adulthood, one that I am happy to take.

6. I found this movie, Barry Munday, and it is my new favorite.


7. My dreads are kicking ass. I need to take a picture of them, but they are locking and have a few beads and junk in them. I love them. I love that they set me apart from all of the other stay at home moms in my area.

Uhhhh, I can't think of anything for 8 through 10. I am going to go back to my book and wait for Josh to come back in so we can watch our show :)

Today I Felt Infinite

Tonight I had a moment, actually several minutes, of perfection. How beautiful it is when every single aspect of an experience is exactly right and I just get to bask in the joy of it all.
We went outside after dinner and John was playing with a few matchbox cars creating a little story for them. Josh and I were listening, but not involved. Then John said my some of my favorite words..."Daddy, come play with me."
***John is sometimes a bit standoffish with his dad. He spends all day with me and Josh is gone a lot for work. As a result, John doesn't want his dad to do things with him some of the time.***
They got on the trampoline and I got to watch my husband be a daddy. Not just a father, someone who provides and lays down rules, but a daddy who loves his boy in ways he doesn't always think to show. They bounced and I sat in the shade. The temperature was so perfect, probably 70 degrees. It was that time of day/evening when the light is perfect and makes even our dried out backyard seem glorious. It was just...infinite. Perfect beyond words. I hesitated to get my camera because I didn't want to miss even a second, but I also wanted a tangible representation of this memory. Here are a few pictures that I snapped, they may not look all that important to you, but trust me...they were.

 I feel that I should explain this shirt, which is pretty much the trashiest thing Josh owns. Its sleeves are cut off, and even though it has a flag, it is actually from the strip club he went to for his bachelor party. I think it is hilarious, but thankfully he only wears it when working on cars.

Oh my goodness! Things have been so insane here at the Ventura house. Here is the short version of events since mid-Jan.
1. Josh got the flu...bad. He was so exhausted that he passed out twice and ended up in bed for like 4 days. 2. We got to go to this amazing cabin that one of his clients owns. They are so generous to us and let us go by ourselves for the weekend. Pics below
3. I signed up to do my first craft show. This was especially scary because I don't carry stock of anything. Everything I do is custom, so I had to make EVERYTHING before the show.
4. I got the flu...bad. My mom took John for two days and my dad took him for two. It was doubly horrible to be sick and be heartsick missing my baby.
5. John got RSV and was also incredibly sick. Luckily, the universe cut us a break and John waited to get sick until I was moderately better and could take care of him.
6. Once he got better his temper and moods were absolutely out of control. I spent 5 days in tears and frustrated dealing with whining and temper tantrums that I have never experienced.
7. John snapped out of it and I had 5 days to craft almost everything I needed before the crafts show that took place on Feb 12th.
Soooo...I haven'thad a chance to do much of anything, let alone blog. I am so excited to get back to our routine and have some adventures to share. Josh turns 30 on Saturday, so we are having a date night. John started potty training today, which is a big old step off of a cliff because I have zero idea what I am doing :) He is excited though, and I love seeing his little tushy in underpants.

Here are some pics from the last month, including the craft show.

  The Unkamama Crafts Table :)

Sick mama, Sick Baby, Happy Cat

Hugging "Frosty"

Snow Angels

A small taste of this gorgeous cabin

Fort Building at home :)

I hope I get to post more regularly again now that things have calmed down.

New Offering Photos

Under The Sea Felt Board

2011

I haven't really made any "goals" for 2011. However, I have really been thinking about what I would like to see happen in 2011. Not really specific actions that I have a set path to accomplish, more like destinations that I hope to reach by some path or another. I don't know if that really makes sense, but I know that it all feels different and less structured than the resolutions that I usually make and forget two weeks later.

Here are a few...

1. I hope that my Waldorf ideas really start to pull themselves together and that when Johns turns three, or somewhere thereabouts, we have a rhythm set up to help him thrive and grow. That isn't to say that I want to put off his success until March :) Just that I want Waldorf to be a real, essential part of our lives by then. The good news is that I have his whole time with me to grow and learn along with him.

2. I hope that this group of mama friends I have recently connected with becomes a strong support system for both John and I. These are woman who have so much to teach and share and I just think they are wonderful people. I am so thankful that we are going to be gathering on a regular basis for full moon celebrations and other gatherings to celebrate this world.

Plus, look how much fun my little man has with the other kids :) He's the one with the vagrant hair if you couldn't tell.

3. Along the same note, I hope that I continue to keep in touch and evolve friendships with the other amazing people I met in 2010. It seems like I have known some of you forever (Rikki, Courtney) and I just feel so much more full since I have you in my life.

4. This one is a little more concrete...I hope that Josh gets his next promotion and that we can get our own place again. I have been longing to have a place to put things and to have a sanctuary to teach and create in. I love living with my dad and I will be forever grateful, but we are ready for the next step.

5. I hope that I can continue to build this inner peace. I saw snippets of it in 2010. I did better in 2010 than in many of the years prior, which is funny because we lost so very much. The good ews is that we gained so much more than we lost, and I hope we can continue along that road.

6. The most important one...I hope that my family stays healthy and that we continue to love each other in the fiercest way possible. We have bumps in the road, but in the end these two boys are the most real gifts this universe has ever given to me and I hope that I can continue to treat them as such for the rest of our lives.

So...that's my 2011 in a nutshell :)