What I'm Lovin'

Hey All,

So once again I have had a little hiatus. Nothing bad has been going on, in fact everything has been really wonderful. Since I have been feeling full of happy thoughts, I thought I would share some things that I am loving right now!

The weather is finally getting cool enough that we can venture outside during the day. John had a doctors appointment and we took him to a train park afterward. He LOVED the train ride, making it impossible to get a good picture :) Notice how gnarly my dreads are right now? They are getting tightened up tomorrow :)

Pumpkin Patches! Although, the tractor was a MUCH bigger hit than the pumpkins. Luckily, you don't have to pay to get into that part of the patch so we can go back over and over...and over.

I love how John is getting so independent. He isn't scared to do much which is both thrilling and terrifying for me. I try very hard not to let my fears keep him from exploring. The downside, a few minutes after this picture he fell from that exact rung, which is about 4 feet off of the ground. Luckily he wasn't badly hurt and quickly told me he wanted to do it again.

Crazy hair :) We are trying to grow it long and it does some wacky stuff.

These bangs! Remember how I just said we are growing it out? His bangs were in his eyes all the time, so we got them trimmed. Now he looks like a mix between Lloyd from Dumb and Dumber and Ringo Starr. It makes me smile every time I look at him :)

 Amanda Palmer is currently rocking my world thanks to Miss Courtney!!! LOVE!!!!!

Florence and the Machine has also been on heavy rotation. Lungs (the cd) makes me dance around no matter what I am doing.

 Knitting!!!! I have finally started to learn and have successfully completed one head wrap for my dreads and half a scarf. I still need to learn so much more, as in I only know one stitch but I am still so excited.

The local chapter of this organization is organizing a lecture/gathering about adoption in Phoenix on Nov 6th. This is a subject that is very dear to my heart, but one that I find so overwhelming. I am anxious to go and finally be able to wrap my head around all of the information.

I just love it.

Do You Ever

Have so many things to share and talk about that you get overwhelmed? I actually have so much that I think I might just avoid sharing it at all and start fresh from square one :)

I hope everyone is enjoying the start of fall as much as we are. I will be back later with a real post and some pictures. I need to do some cleaning right now :)

Vacation

I know that my previous post was sad but I also wanted to make sure I posted some pictures from our vacation.

Here It Goes...

Driving to San Diego. John was sooooo good, but he missed the memo about sleeping in the car.

 He was awake the whole time.

 Walking out of the hotel and down to the beach

 Playing in the sand. It was pretty chilly so we didn't get to stay for long.

 LEGOland!!!!

 It was so cool to go on the rides because John thought that he was actually driving a Jeep.

It was so amazing to see him full of excitement and wonder

 Uh Oh, A lion ate mama

 I know this picture should make me feel a little sad but it actually makes me laugh a little every time I see it.

Something about his expression melts me.

This was probably his favorite part of the day.

He talked alll day about flying his helicopter.

 I love his unexpected smile in this picture.

 John and Daddy walked up one of the sand dunes in CA.

I think it is cool that John looks like he is all alone in the Sahara Desert.

There is our vacation in a nutshell. I may write another post about how fun and challenging it was to travel with a toddler.

Not Really Prepared

We went on vacation this week and got home last night. While we were unpacking my dad's cat Louie (also known as Lucifer) snuck outside. I saw him and went to put him back in the house, but hesitated. Was this really our cat? This cat was so thin, Louie was a big fat cat. This cat was so quiet, Louie would have fought me picking him up. It turned out that it was my dad's cat, just a really sick version of my dad's cat. Between Saturday when we left and Wednesday when we got back he had become an entirely different animal.
I immediately asked my dad what was going on and he said that Louie hadn't been eating much and that he was keeping an eye on him. I think because he was with him every day he just didn't see how drastic the change was. I went into our apartment and started to cry, Louie was dying and nobody realized it.
By this morning there was no doubt, and when I took him to the vet this afternoon I thought he almost passed away in the car. It turns out that he was in kidney failure and so my dad and sister had to put him to sleep. John and I were there, though not in the room, because we had taken him to the vets. My sister was so upset, but I felt so much peace about the decision because I had seen how much he was suffering through the course of the day.
After we left and got into the car, John started asking where Louie went, and that is when the business that I feel truly unprepared for started.
I honestly didn't know what to tell my two year old son. I am not religious and I don't believe in heaven, so I told him the most peaceful thing I could think of. I told him that Louie went to go live in the sky where he would be able to feel better. John told me that he was going to have to be careful not to fall. I thought, "well that was easy."
Then my dad got into the car (we had to go back and get my sister's car because she was too upset to drive herself home.) John told my dad that Louie went to live in the sky and my dad told him that Louie was in the sky living with God. John then asked, "Who is God?" "Will he make Louie better? Will Louie want his food again?"
My poor dad had no idea what to tell him about God. He knows I am not a believer and didn't want to step on any toes. I had no idea what to tell him because everyone in his life except me are believers and I don't want to rob John of the chance to decide for himself. In the end we told him that he would learn about God later. He brought Louie and the sky up about 25 more times throughout the evening. He never seemed distressed, just curious about what happened. He even asked me if God was going to fix Louie with a saw and a drill. Children are so honest and open, but I wasn't prepared fr such thoughtful questions.
I guess I really need to start figuring out what Josh and I are going to tell John so that we can present religion to John in a well rounded, unjudgemental and comfortable way. Religion is such a hot button topic in my home since Josh is a Christian and I am probably what one would consider a Pagan. The thing about it is, I have been avoiding religion for so long due to my distaste for my experiences with Christianity, that I really need to solidify my beliefs so that I have some ideas to share with John. I am totally comfortable with him learning two points of view and deciding for himself, but I need to make sure that I understand what my point of view is.
So, it was an eventful, sorrowful and thoughtful day. I have a cloud over my heart for Louie but I do know that he was suffering and release was the best option for him.